The Switch

From a recent Rolling Stone:

Can the Internet-service providers put an end to file-sharing at the flick of a switch? That's the theory floating around at one major label, at least. "Once the ISPs get involved in content, once they have a stake in it, they'll put an end to downloading," says one executive, whose IT department has suggested that the ISPs can block P2Ps almost as easily as throwing a switch. "Right now the ISPs' foremost concern is getting high-speed internet into homes--that's their business model. And look how they advertise it: 'Quicker to download photos and music.' People don't download music legally." (bold mine)

This quote shows some of the complete and utter lunacy that pervades the music industry. It is irrelevant to me whether or not ISPs can block P2P services easily. It is also irrelevant to the piracy of music because if they shut down one service or file-type such as bittorent another will spring up almost immediately. They can block bittorents as recent AP investigations have shown, but that is not really a way to do anything, it's a bit like burning down the library because people might be stealing books.

But my real issue is with the bold face part at the end and the way that it shows this 'executive' as a fool. Do the millions of legally downloaded and paid for songs from I-tunes or Rhapsody or New Napster or any of the other legal services just magically appear on people's computer's without being downloaded? High speed internet makes THOSE downloads faster too, not just the pirated ones.

What a Jackass.

Music Meme From Tommy

As I do not post much anymore here is a late tag from Tommy:

What music are you currently grooving to?
I have Tak by Sigur Ros and Will the Circle Be Unbroken songs of the Carter Family in the truck right now. And Roxanne and I bought a bunch of new CD's at the Dollar Tree recently that I'm working through, such as Country music sung by Country singers and football players and a disc of children's songs about the Hulk.

What, if push comes to shove, is your all-time favourite album?
Kiss Unplugged or Henry Rollins Henrietta Collins and the Wifebeating Childhaters or Gwar's Ragnarok

What was the first record you ever bought? And where did you buy it?
Cassette Tape-Billy Joel's Storm Front
CD-Tom Petty and the Heartbreaker's Greatest Hits

Which musician have you ever wanted to be?
The one and only Dr. Teeth, or animal.

What do you sing in the shower?
A frighteningly large amount of show-tunes and Wizard of Oz songs.

What is your favourite Saturday night record?
I do not listen to music at night.

And your Sunday morning record?
If this is going for religious, I like Johnny Cash's My Mother's Hymn Book or Ralph Stanley's Sunday Morning, on the way to work I like Gene Simmons Asshole

TNA Thoughts

Rikishi still looks like Rikishi only at 2/3 speed. Little bit of ring rust there, but if they keep using him he'll shape up. Look for him soon in a tag team with Eric Young and Shark Boy where they all dance!

Judas Messias attacks everybody tonight and gets run off by Rhino. He's slow and plodding in the ring and smaller than Eric Young!

Kevin Nash is comedy gold.

I'm optimistic about the second hour of impact. I hope they make good use of it and actually have time to showcase all the titles and angles in one show.

TNA Thoughts

Some random thoughts after this weeks Impact:

Rikishi is now in TNA. Now if they could just bring back Sonny Siaki and maybe get Meng in there they could have a really strong Samoan contingent.

Now I have seen Black Reign. I like the spinning suplex, but I don't think that he'll be able to do that one on anyone over Eric Young's size. (Which, I suppose is fine since 80% of the roster is that size or under) If Eric wanted to save Shark Boy from being hurt, wouldn't it have made more sense to make the save BEFORE Sharky was clobbered with the club in the back of the head, and not just before the rat made an appearance. And, doesn't this mean that Jake the Snake is the logical opponent for Black Reign?

New tights are needed for Judas Messias. The purple Razor Ramon blood style just isn't going to work. They need to think more along the lines of Kevin Thorne. I was soooo hoping that Messias would just be a repackaged Brian Lee or Slash. Maybe he will be impressive, I do not know. If they give him an entrance where he cuts through something on the entranceway and the cuts bleed or something along that line it might be a cool visual, but he's going to have to be able to bring something to the table in the ring. I just don't know how they can effectively push him as a monster when he's the same size as Bobby Roode.

I see on TNA.com that Messias will be squashing Eric Young next week on Impact. Hooray, that means that Messias and Black Reign can team up. I had gotten the distinct impression that they delayed the debut of Messias so as not to conflict with the debut of Black Reign, so now they can be together on screen!

Impact goes to two hours in October, now they can have two hours not to use Raven in!

Sandman is now a free agent again. So is Sabu. So is Eugene.

When is TNA going to bring in Kaz Hyashi for a battle of the Kazs? Does Kaz Hyashi still have the Glacier gimmick he bought from Glacier on Nitro?

When, exactly is Jarret going to return? Angle needs a good ole el Kabong. I don't think Sting will end up Champ at BFG.

I miss Slash and the New Church. Mostly just Slash. Only just Slash.

Doesn't it really just have to be Frank Wycheck that teams with someone to take on Truth and Pac-Man? Won't that match suck? Maybe they could get Dale Torborg for it.

Did the Punisher Andrew Martin even have a real match in TNA?

Can they really keep saying that Abyss is 6'8" with a straight face without inflating Tomko to 7'4" and Matt Morgan to 12'10"?

Enough already.

Irony?

Today as one of my co-workers walked by muttering to herself as she usually does, I 'jokingly' said to myself "I hope one day I can be the crazy guy at work that mutters to himself constantly."

Then I realized that I had just muttered that to myself.

Chocolate Pudding

No posting in quite awhile here lately. So a random notes post is in order:

Went to see Modest Mouse with my wife and sister at the Ryman not to long ago. Really good show. I don't know many of their songs, but ended up with what turned out to be their new single in my head for about a week afterward, but it rung out beautifully and I was able to play notes I had never even heard before.

TNA is getting beter and WWE is getting worse. WWE is suspending half their roster and firing some others for substance abuse. I can only hope that this will end up with Chris Masters and Randy Orton being fired and NOT ending up in TNA.

Warren Ellis' new book Crooked Little Vein is exactly what one would expect from a Warren Ellis novel, if one knows what to expect from a Warren Ellis novel. If you don't know what to expect, then I imagine it might be a we bit shocking. Unless you watch Nip/Tuck.

Possibly still shocking anyway.

Roxanne, Tommy, Katy and I are minutely visible in the TNA Slammiversary DVD. Find us when Kurt Angle is on top of the ladder celebrating, or when the show is just starting. Extra credit if anyone spots Chicken Hat at ringside.

TNA Thoughts, Slammiversary 2007

Tommy, Katy, Roxanne and I took a trip up to Nashville last night to attend TNA Wrestling's Slammiversary.

Before the event we stopped at Toot's in Cookeville, which is the Bizzaro world version of Toot's in Murfreesboro. Instead of MTSU memorabilia, there was Tennessee Tech stuff all over. The food was the same though. I love me some fried dill pickles.

We headed up to the show through Crossville to avoid the traffic from Hippie Jam Band Festival Bonnaro in Manchester. On the way back we did get to experience actual Hippies at a truck stop called Love's. It was Christmas and New Years all rolled into one for police along the interstate last night as they seemed to just be pulling over any of the many many VW microbuses on the road.

I must mention the quite possibly insane parking guy that we paid at the Municipal Auditorium and the fact that he would not stop talking and mumbling to himself and seemed slightly ill equiped to deal with all the traffic!

Now, on to the show:

The first match of the night was Ms. Brooks vs. some DJ Guy. The DJ Guy got his jollies feeling Ms. Brooks up and almost broke his neck doing a second rope moonsault. He lost and got kicked for his trouble. This was a throwaway, but no real horribleness.

Next we were 'treated' to a mini-set by the band of the evening the Lo Cash Cowboys. Aparantly they didn't get the memo that if you have two lead singers you might not want them both to look and sing exactly the same. The drummer and the Bass player fought a very passive battle over who could look more bored. The singers tried to pop the crowd by mentioning that they were influenced by "ZZ TOP! GREAT WHITE!! LYNRYD SKYNRYD!!! AND ABBA!!!!" in a way that reminded me way to much of Goldylocks pandering that people said she reminded them of a female Kid Rock.

The band played a medly with the Georgia Sattleites "Don't Give Me No Lies" in it, and managed to make at least seven people in the crowd dance, including Chicken Hat.

Did I mention that Tommy spotted Chicken Hat in the front row? Those were $150 tickets, those were.

Also we got to experience the Drunken Frat Boy Experience, as there were at least four very drunken fellas right in front of us who really liked to stand up all the time!

On to the matches:

RHINO & SENSHI VS. THE LAX--Good little match that saw Hernandez throw LowShi around the ring like a rag doll and Konnan and Hector Guererro do almost nothing. The guys in the ring really busted ass on this one, especially LowShi and Homicide.
Rhino and LowShi win with the outside interferance into a Gore.

X TITLE MATCH: CHRIS SABIN vs. "BLACK MACHISMO" JAY LETHAL--Lethal has the macho schtick down and pulled out all the classics as well as his own moves in this one. Really good match.
Machismo wins the title with the Elbow Drop.

FRANK WYCHECK AND JERRY LYNN VS. JAMES STORM AND THE TRUTH--Wycheck didn't kill James Storm with the pile-driver that won this match. Jerry and Truth worked hard and so did Storm. I just hope this doesn't mean Wycheck is going full time for TNA.
Wycheck wins with a pile-driver.

MR. BACKLUND VS. ALEX SHELLEY--Better match than it had any right to be on paper, and Backlund did his part well. It is odd that I find Backlund way more entertaining now than at any other point in his career and he worked well with Shelley.

STIENER/ANIMAL VS. DUDLEYS--Better also than it had a right to be. Animal got a huge pop and worked as well as Scott would have. Dudley's win.

ABYSS VS. TOMKO--Before the show I commented to Roxanne and Tommy that someone would be jumping off the top of the entrance ramp, since there were two large ladders going up either side of the stage. During this match, both of the men went off the top. Good brawl with Abyss winning.

KING OF THE MOUNTAIN--CHRISTIAN VS. AJ VS. JOE VS. ANGLE VS. KITTEN--Great match with lots of high spots and convoluted rules. Kitten held his own ring wise, but still isn't quite up to the main event spot. Everybody worked really hard and didn't die. Angle wins.

See our pictures below that Roxanne took.

Slammiversary Pictures

Pictures from TNA Slammiversary 6-17-07, by Roxanne

New Sly Stallone Movie Pitches

Marion Cobretti

Marion 'Cobra' Cobretti is down on his luck. Once viewed as the only man harder than Dirty Harry, now he's forgotten and living by day as a Denny's short order cook and by night as a bouncer at a hotel bar.

Until the night he witnesses a Senator murdering a prostitute with a new, powerful drug cocktail called Smark. Teaming up with the sassy black waitress Kaneesha, Cobra returns to his crime fighting roots and takes it all the way to the Senate floor where he violently assaults the perpetrator and fills him full of his own drug.

"Just say no."


The Guy From Over The Top

The Guy From Over the Top--TGFOTT is down on his luck. Once viewed as the only truck-driver/arm wrestling champion to be able to overcome all the odds and win his son's love and the championship, now he's forgotten and driving a manure truck. His only companion is a sassy orangutan named Zeke who is now the only 'person' willing to arm-wrestle him. Fortunately Zeke's forearms are superhumanly strong and even out of the game TGFOTT's arms are bigger than Popeye's.

An evil trucking firm threatens to buy out the family owned company TGFOTT drives for and he reluctantly enters the world arm wrestling championships to try to make the money to save the company. He trains hard with Zeke, but when he finds out that his son (who he has not seen for ten years) is also in the competition to try and make enough money to save the Orphanage that he runs from being bought by greedy developers he almost loses his nerve.

Zeke convinces him that the money will be enough to save both, and reminds him that at the very least it is just a shit delivery company.

Later it is discovered that TGFOTT's son is not his son at all, but an impostor and that Zeke was his son all along.


Frank Stallone

Frank Stallone (Sylvester Stallone) is a down on his luck actor who can't get more than bit parts, even in his own brother's movies (Sylvester Stallone, played by Frank Stallone). He lands the part of Zeke in The Guy From Over the Top, but loses it at the last minute when he fails monkey school.

Hilarity of course ensues.

Steve Guttenberg also has a role as a talking panda bear named gus.

And someone gets their head punched off into a wall of molten lava. Possibly by Bolo Yeung.

Greatest Thing Ever

I found the greatest crappy food item ever today at Big Lots. Even greater than Nascar Hamburgers. Even greater than Jeff Foxworthy Ham Jerky.

I give you Rap Snacks



Here we have Lil' Romeo Bar-B-quin' with my Honey and Dirt McGirt Sour Cream and Onion.

Romeo urges you to stay in school and Dirt says think responsibly.

I-have-no-more-words.

Wrassler

Here's the beginning of a new story.

For every Hulk Hogan there are a hundred Tony Atlases, and for every Tony Atlas there are a thousand Gypsy Joes.

I'm not even a Gypsy Joe.

You don't remember me. It's o.k., nobody really does, except my Ex-Wives and the IRS.

I've been around the world and back again, from the gutter to the Penthouse and back to the gutter more times than I can count.

I've had more names than I can count too. In Indianapolis in '72 I was the Mad Mook; In Philly in '76 I was Jimmy the Retard; In Atlanta in '77 I was Kruschev the Killer, and then ten years later under a hood I was Mr. Midnight #2.

But I started out and I'm gonna end as Leonard Bergeron Chapek.

I didn't expect it to ring a bell.

I've been a grave-digger, a short order cook, a tobacco farmer, a janitor (twice) and a bunch of other shit not worth mentioning. But the only thing I was ever good at was wrestling. Some people might argue with that, but the promoter's knew what they were doing when the brought me in.

If they needed a Heel to make their Babyface, I was the man to do it.

There've been plenty of guys that they say could get a great match out of a mop if they tried, but I didn't even need the mop. In Birmingham in '74 as Uncle Rascal, I convinced the marks that there was an invisible grappler called Tim Spook and managed to work for three months without even having an opponent.

I know the business better than most. I know how to squeeze pennies until they turn silver. I know the look in a promoter's eye that they get when they're going to short you. I know how to milk any hint of fame and I know how to dig through the garbage.

Put me in the ring with your Babyface and I will make him. Put me in the ring with your top Heel. Put me in the ring with your son.

Hell, put me in the ring with your dog and I will make it a star.

Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. R.I.P.

Bill Bacon is...

...the legislative director for the Pennsylvania Social Services Union, SEIU Local 668.

...president of the store.

...finding traction on the insides of the corners, where the grasses and leaves offer something to hook-up on.

...the better guy to ask on this.

...chiding the professional prac-. titioners for their neglect of research, debate and informed exchange

...the Music Minister for First Baptist Church in Clinton and has been there since 1976.

...putting the final touches on a film about the Friendship.

...looking for Spud:

...obviously not willing to discuss the other issues since he cannot make the STCC or Move That Bridge look bad by doing so.

...a pipefitter working with a Saint John contractor.

...with us only in spirit.

...the coordinator of the HUGS family.

The Riches

I caught the pilot episode of the Riches starring Eddie Izzard and Minnie Driver and was left feeling a bit underwhelemed.

I like Izzard immensly, and Driver quite a bit, but the show as a whole doesn't really work in the first episode. I don't require every show be Nip/Tuck or the Shield in pacing, but it really doesn't help your show in your first episode when you rely on a chance encounter with a cop to supply most of your expository dialogue on a setting that might not be familiar with many viewers.

Irish Travellers might not be familiar to all viewers, and relying on two minutes of dialogue to set the stage doesn't really help. If somebody tuned in late they'd probably just assume the clan at their camp were just having a redneck family reunion.

It's interesting that FX keeps greenlighting shows where foreign actors play Americans, which isn't always bad such as in Nip/Tuck, but here some of the accents area bit dodgy and it's a bit hard to buy some of the characters.

I want to like this show, and I think that it can get better, but I don't know if the ratings will hold up if a show that was sortof billed as a bit of a comedy (Izzard in the promos only) keeps such a somber and slow pace.

About 15 minutes should have been cut from the pilot. As in professional wrestling more time to tell story is not necessarily going to be time well spent telling the story.

Shortest Reunion Ever

So i guess that Eddie Van Halen figured out between issues of Rolling Stone that Diamond Dave is still Diamond Dave. It's just too damn bad that there don't seem to be any Van Halens that can sing.

They should either just bury the hatchett with Sammy (He'd come back in a heartbeat I think), or Wolfgang or Eddie just need to marry some singer (Linda Perry or Axl Rose maybe).

I wonder if this time in rehab Eddie will be confronted with the fact that it is, in fact, him that is the unreasonable one in the band.

Jake the Snake

Went to see the wrasslers at the comic store with the other wrasslin fans today. Saw the local fellers (not pictured). Saw the Lance "Dallas" Hoyt from TNA. Saw the Jake the Snake. Got the autographs. Wife got picture with Jake.

Good day.

R.A.W. R.I.P.

On January 11 at 4.50 a.m. Bob Wilson died.

I haven't mentioned it before here, not because I didn't notice. Or because it didn't mean anything to me, rather because I've been trying to put it out of my head.

I want to be joyous and happy for his passing from pain, and I am happy that he is in no more pain. I am not happy that he is gone.

His writings which came to me at the proper time in my life and guided me well are still here. My impression of him and the Bob that I imagine he was still lives on, but I am saddened that I will not see Cosmic Trigger vol. 4 and after. I am saddened that I will never be present for one of his speaking gigs and that I will never meet him in person.

I am saddened that the world has lost a sage.

I can only hope to attempt to continue making each moment a bigger and happier reality tunnel and remember the things he taught me.

fnord.

Briar Rabbit in the Cemeteries *Updated*

One of my friends, D.C. Stewart, has just published a guide to McMinn County's cemeteries called Briar Rabbit in the Cemeteries: A Special Map Guide to McMinn County, Tennessee Burial Grounds.

It's a book of maps that He spent over two years compiling that point the way to pretty much every cemetery in McMinn County, especially the hard to find ones. It's hard bound, a little over 400 pages and has about 200 hand drawn maps so that you can find the spot you're looking for. There are also photos from every cemetery included.

Also, I contributed the cover illustration (Roxanne did the lettering on the tombstone), but that really isn't that much of a contribution.

This really is a nice looking book, and I'd recommend it to anyone who is a fan of local history, really needs some maps to local cemeteries, or just would like to have a good looking book full of maps and pictures.

The book isn't really on sale just yet, but Dennis is planning on holding a book signing at PostNet in Athens (they did the binding and printing) on Saturday, Feb. 10 at 3 p.m.

It'll also be available for purchase at Village Bookshop in Athens. The price will be somewhere in the neighborhood of $35

* UPDATE *
Dennis will be holding his signing at PostNet in Athens on Monday, February 12 at 3 p.m. If you are even halfway interested in picking up the book I'd urge you to come out and meet Dennis and support his work.

Dr. Mystery, Th.D

And so it begins, My myspace music page Dr. Mystery, Th.D.

Clerks II revisited

I realized something watching the documentary about the making of Clerks II. It makes me wonder if Kevin Smith even realizes what Clerks II is really about.

In Clerks II Dante is getting ready to move to Florida because he feels that he has done everything in Jersey and is tired of living there and he is going to marry into a wealthy family. Randall just wants Dante to stay in Jersey where he belongs.

This is an exact parallel to the relationship of Kevin Smith and his producer and best friend Scott Mosier. After the flop and disappointment that was Jersey Girl Kevin was going to go on and try to make Green Hornet, but Scott just wanted to get out of movies and walk the Earth.

I think Kevin really decided to make Clerks II to keep Mosier in his life more than for any other reason. Kevin is Randall, just trying to keep Dante in Jersey by re-opening the Quick Stop.