Ting-a-Ling

Here's a little joke I thought I would share from Kurt Vonnegut's TimeQuake. It is the origin of Kilgore Trout's phrase Ting-a-Ling, which he liked to say was what he said when the air strikes he called in in WWI hit their mark, but actually it was from a dirty joke that his father came into his room at midnight and told him. His father was insane and killed his mother. Here's the joke:

There was a fugitive who sought shelter in the home of a woman he knew. Her living room had a cathedral ceiling, which is to say it went all the way up to the roof peak, with rustic rafters spanning the air space below.

She was a widow, and he stripped himself naked while she went to fetch some of her husband's clothes. But before he could put them on, the police were hammering on the front door with their billy clubs. So the fugitive hid on the top of a rafter. When the woman let in the police, though, his oversize testicles hung down in full view.

The police asked the woman where the guy was. The woman said she didn't know what guy they were talking about. One of the cops saw the testicles hanging down from a rafter and asked what they were. She said they were Chinese temple bells. He believed her. He said he'd always wanted to hear Chinese temple bells.

He gave them a whack with his billy club, but there was no sound. So he hit them again, a lot harder, a whole lot harder. Do you know what the guy on the rafter shrieked?

He shrieked, TING-A-LING, YOU SON OF A BITCH!